Christian living

Beauty and Self-Esteem: the Point We’re Missing (Pt. 1, the Love of God)

Can we be real for a moment?

Sometimes the “feel good” phrases don’t help. Sometimes even reciting Bible verses doesn’t change anything. We know in our heads we’re supposed to put our worth in Jesus. We know in our heads we’re loved, and that the attention of the world doesn’t matter.

But sometimes ”knowing it in our heads” doesn’t change anything. I think I know why.

Believing, Not Just Knowing

I first truly believed God’s love several years ago. The Holy Spirit had been convicting me a lot, and I felt I just needed to quit sinning and obey. It hit me and flooded my heart with relief. I read one verse and burst into tears.

Hebrews 12:6

“For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
    and chastises every son whom he receives.”

Simple verse, profound concept. I had always known that God loved me, but I never believed it like I did then. I understood God loved me, and that I could see his love in the conviction I was feeling.

When I just remembered God’s love, that’s all that mattered. I really believed he loved me, and I saw the proof of it in my own life.

Believing something is different than knowing something.

Once you believe God really loves you and has a plan for you, it doesn’t matter if you’re popular, if you have a boyfriend, or if you can figure out how to use eyeliner. God’s love is unconditional, and you can get real with him. There’s no need to act like someone you’re not for him. Since God loves you, you have the most valuable, unconditional friend in him. His opinion is what matters most.

Put your confidence in God and make knowing Him your ultimate goal in life. Don’t base the way you view yourself on your looks and performance. Beauty is “skin deep” and it won’t last forever. It depends on the “eye of the beholder”, social norms, and a number of other changing standards. If we put our identity in our appearance, our confidence risks being pulled right out from under us. In the same way, our skills and performance will never please everyone, and we there will always be someone more talented or bright. We must base the way we see ourselves on the what God says about us.

Do you believe GOD loves YOU?

Suggested: God Knows What’s Best for You

I have a challenge for you to get you started.

First, go through Psalm 139. Pray through it, think over it, and ask God a million questions about it. Forget everything on earth you’ve put your identity in. Your grades, your sports performance, your looks, your friends, your feelings- lay them all aside and remember what is really important. If you lose everything, you’ll still have God. And even when you don’t think He’s there, He remains faithful. That’s why His love is so unusual. It sounds silly, but He’s the same God even on our bad hair days. It’s the unconditional love you want from your best friends times a million.

Of course, believing God’s love is something we cannot do on our own. We have to choose to believe God loves us (even if we don’t feel like he does) and then ask him to change our hearts, saying like the father in Mark, “Lord, I believe; Help my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24).

15 thoughts on “Beauty and Self-Esteem: the Point We’re Missing (Pt. 1, the Love of God)”

  1. Reblogged this on This Is Who You Are and commented:
    Hey everyone, today I am going to share with you this beautiful post by Rachel! It is so true, we can know the truth but not believe it. Sometimes it takes time to learn to cross from just knowing the truth about who you are, and actually believing it ❤


  2. Amazing, true, and SUPER MEANINGFUL post, Rachel!
    This helped me to realize that God loves me just as I am, no matter what other people think of me! Thank you so much!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow, this is so true! I spent my entire life knowing that I was valuable, but not believing it. Even now there are times when I know it but don’t believe it. ❤ And it is such a hard thing to realize that no matter how much I tell me friends that they are valuable, or I tell other people that they are worth it, I can't get them to believe it. Only they can choose to believe it, just like only I can choose to believe it. That is hard for me because I long with all of my heart to fix things for my friends, to dry their tears, to heal their hearts, because I love them so much. But I have to remember that only God can do that ❤


    1. So true, Rae. I can definitely relate. I want to stick this truth into the hearts of so many girls, but it’s not up to me to do that. I think the truth of God’s love is something we have to chose to believe daily, even if we don’t feel it’s true. Thanks for reading:)

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Rachel, I teared up as I was reading this because it really speaks to where I am right now. I realized a few weeks ago that I had been changing myself to make myself likeable to these friends who weren’t really friends, and now I just want to get back to who I was before, who God created me to be, and who I am in Christ. This was super helpful.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I guess I’m a sympathetic crier- teared up myself when I read your comment. ❤ There is so much to work through as a teen girls with self-esteem and the way we view ourselves. It's so easy to lose sight of who we really are and how God really changes our lives. So glad this was helpful, Hadassah.

      Liked by 1 person

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